Let's Talk About Sex Pt.II Men

Ok, men lets get started in peeling these layers back and start examining why there is no intimacy in your marriage.  My wife just don't want to have sex me, she always have an excuse...I'm tired...the kids...the sun didn't come out today....blah...blah..blah...excuse after...excuse. Believe me I understand.  There is a deeper issue that needs to be addressed, and that issue is the WHY. Yeah we can look her and place the blame on her, but there is usually an underlining factor that causes your wife to shut down. See gentlemen, for us  it's the physical release, for them it's about making a connection. We can be ready at the drop of dime, it does take much. The wind could blow and we're ready to make something happen. Most women are not wired like that. If the first time you are touching your wife, is when it is time to put in work...she is going to be cold and un-receptive. If you are lying in the bed and you just start groping your wife and you have not spoke to her all day, the response is going to be cold. Do you all get what I am saying. Sex for a women is more then the actual act.  See, woman are like a roast. It taste better when it's cooked  in a slower cooker.

Gentlemen, I know what you are thinking"I shouldn't have to do all that". Well, you did all that in the beginning. We make our wives common, and we stop the romance. That is why I said "You first have to look in the mirror". In my own experience, I stopped doing the romantic stuff. The calls, the texts, the cards, the flowers... just because. So, gentlemen we have to figure out what makes  our wives tick? What pushes her buttons? Do you even know what your wife likes? An I am not talking about food or tv shows? My  wife asked "do you know what turns me on"?  Without hesitation, I was able to tell her. I didn't always know, it took some time. Now the challenge is the APPLICATION. Knowing and not doing means that there is some selfishness in me. "She not loving me like I think she should, so I'm not going to do what she wants". So, everyday I try to make a conscious decision to do what makes her feel connected to me. Sometimes I hit the mark, sometimes I don't...but everyday I try to do better.

See, gentleman woman love a take charge kinda guy, but not controlling.   When was the last time you planned a date? Or chose a restaurant? When was the last time your wife came home to bubble bath? When was the last time yall cuddled without the expectation of sex? Gentlemen, if your wife is like my wife she is making decisions all day at work, so for her to come home and make decisions turns her off.  Not to discount how hard we work.

Gentlemen we need to take the time out to re-learn our wives and that is vise versa...and (I will deal with them tomorrow). Gentlemen, this process is not a quick fix. There has to be consistency, you have to let go of your ego and pride. You tap into her needs, she will meet yours.